But he knoweth the way that I take: when he hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold. My foot hath held his steps, his way have I kept, and not declined. – Job 23:10-11 KJV
One day last week, I was in the park killing some time before I headed to an appointment and decided that this would be a great time to practice being still in God’s presence. “What do You want to say to me, Lord? I’m listening.” In the parking lot across from me, a young man in a tank top and shorts got out of his truck, tied his shoes and took off towards the walk path like a pit bull was chasing him. I was like “Alright now! You betta GET IT!”, as I bit into my burger. Then I saw something moving slowly in my left per-rif-fer-riff (peripheral) view. I turned and there was an elderly man in full-length pants, a coat, and gloves coming around the corner of the walk path. The pace he was moving was the equivalent of me walking to the bathroom. I thought, “Deg. He’s moving so slow, he could just walk”, and took another bite of my burger. God clapped back so quick with “Yeah, but at least he’s moving.”
I laughed. “True, true. You got me.”
Y’all, I’ve been chillin’ ministry-wise for almost a year. In April, I left a church I had been a part of for 17 years. It was hard, especially since I had devoted so much of my life to it. I was the lead musician, worship leader, bible study teacher, secretary, public relations person and part-time janitor. (It was a small church and I pitched in where I could.) So you can probably understand my decision to chill out for a minute once I left. I was tired. And burned out. And I felt used. I really didn’t trust anything related to church. I’ve been in “pour into me” mode, visiting several churches (I joined one in December)…loving the fact that all I had to do was show up and not lift a finger.
Oh, but I miss using my fingers. My heart has longed to teach and sing and play and minister – to do SOMEthing – but I wasn’t telling a soul because there is NO WAY I am going back to the way things were. Man, I’ve even been hesitant to post frequently on this blog and it’s MY blog!!
Lately, I’ve been feeling the pull to do more. Well, it’s more like a push. The scene in the park was God’s little “Ahem! Break time is over. You’ve sat down long enough. Gettuh movin’.” nudge for me.
So this is my nice way of letting you know that you’ll be seeing more of me. Every weekday morning, I send music videos and whatever words of encouragement God gives me to groups of people I call my “peeps”. I’ll be posting those words here.
I’m back in this race, y’all, and it already feels better than sitting on the sidelines…eating a burger…doing nothing.